1. The Purpose of Dating

Building something larger

For people who want a long-term relationship, the goal of dating is simple. The focus is to develop, to grow with someone, and to build something larger together. For some, that shared direction includes marriage.

This growth means becoming more of what you already are, and moving toward something larger than yourself. A partner who sees the qualities and abilities already in you will ask you to develop them, and will love you more for doing what you internally love to do for others.

The work needs another person

You can be comfortable on your own and still need a relationship. That need is there so you can grow toward something larger than yourself, and that growth happens with someone. Two imperfect people come together so they can form a closer, shared life: something mutual, larger, and kinder than either person could keep on their own. You begin to feel that shared space when you enter a relationship where you can explore it together.

Trouble begins when you do not know why you are dating, misunderstand the process, or lack a sense of male and female nature.

Benefits

Knowing why you are dating settles the fear, the confusion, and the ideas that pull you off course. The dating process itself gets less stressful. You can tell sooner who is right for you and who is not.

A relationship built this way brings the two of you closer. A partner who sees your abilities loves you more as you develop them. You get to explore a mutual space together: a shared life that is larger and kinder than either person could keep alone.

For a woman, that can mean complete peace: someone who has her best interests in mind, has their shared life in hand, and does it willingly, with care and love. For a man who does that, the energy it creates in her can meet him in a way that is hard to put into words.